Unless I ask, please, as my server, don't tell me how much to tip you!
I get it. Serving at a restaurant can be tough. People ignore you in favor of their cell phones, they are disrespectful, they treat you as though you are less than human and like they are somehow better than you. It baffles me as well. Therefore, I understand the urge to stick it to your patrons, but, at least as far as my money is concerned, it's REALLY not the best way to get good tips!
Tonight my mom and I went out to dinner. When we were seated our server came to take our drink order. I don't drink soda and my mom doesn't drink caffeine after lunch because it keeps her from sleeping. As a result, we both ordered water to drink. (Boring, I know, but read the vibe of your table, man. If, after several times of you asking I haven't flinched on the fact that I want water, please, quit trying to upsell my beverage choice!)
Our meal arrived and we shared a very enjoyable dinner. It tasted great and we had fun chatting while we ate. As we were finishing up, I ordered a dessert to go. I don't often order dessert when I am out, but tonight was a fun night with my mom so it seemed like a good idea. When our server returned with our dessert and our to go boxes (cause let's face it, there was no hope of me ever finishing the amount of food on my plate) he dropped off our check. I put the $25 gift card we had in the check binder as well as my debit card to cover the small remaining balance. Our server left to run the cards. Now, this is where the night gets frustrating for me. When our server returned to the table with the receipt for me to sign he had circled suggested tip amounts on the receipt. I was so insulted! Do I really come across as the type of person who is an incompetent tipper? And even if I do, how do you justify such arrogance in yourself as to tell me how much I should be tipping you??
Now, allow me to share a little of my own personal arrogance--because of the work I do, I tend to be a great tipper. I understand that tips play a huge role in the income of certain jobs and I do my best to take care of my fellow service industry workers. I also understand how a good tip can make a bad day good, and a good day great. I love being able to put a smile on someone's face in such a way. One of my favorite things to do when I have a gift card is to leave the entire amount of the gift card as a cash tip, because I was going to pay for my meal when I decided to go out anyway. It's just a fun thing to do! But I'll tell you, the second I saw those tip amounts circled on my receipt to call my attention to the "appropriate" amount for me to tip, the amount I had been planning to leave was significantly reduced. I really only left what I did because I know that as a server, you are required to tip out to the other people who assist with your tables- the bartender, the busboy, etc.- and those people were fantastic as far as my table went tonight.
So while I understand the temptation to leave a "subtle" reminder for those you serve, especially if you have been stiffed a time or two, I beg of you, don't do it. Keep the beverages full, a smile on your face and be good at what you do. You will be rewarded for it.
Friday, April 18, 2014
Thursday, April 10, 2014
Weighing In: My thoughts on the Cliven Bundy situation
Imagine that you are living in a house that was built by your ancestors. You love this house. It is a piece of who you are, your heritage. It's a beautiful, one of a kind house, well suited to the needs of your family and the lifestyle you intend to live. It has been in your family for just under 150 years, passed down within the statutes of the law, from generation to generation. Each generation has maintained and cared for the house to the greatest of their ability.
One day, a team comes to your house and informs you they are now in charge of managing your house. There are a lot of people on the team. They are powerful and influential, and in an attempt to keep the peace, you agree to let them become a part of your life and have occasional access granted to your home. (I mean, you're not unreasonable, and your mother did teach you to share with others.)
Then, one day, this team shows up at your house and tells you that they are changing the scope of their management practices regarding your house, whether you like it or not. You are now going to be confined to living in only a portion of the house and the rest of the house will be given to some cats. Yep, I said cats. Naturally, you resist. Surely the management team can't just decide that you no longer have access to a portion of your house? Regardless of your resistance, the cats move in and you share your space. Still, you're not willing to give up without a fight. You begin seeking the help of legal council, you go to court, you do everything in your power to stop the management team from coming in and destroying your way of life and taking your home.
Finally, a court order is issued. It's not in your favor. The management team is coming in to take your home. Supposedly, their action is to protect the cats living in your house, but the same group that is taking your house for the cats is also down the road killing cats because they just can't afford to support them. What is your reaction to the situation? How do you respond to the management agency when they arrive at your home?
I'll give you a minute to think about it...
Now, I realize this isn't a direct translation of events as they are unfolding in Nevada. It would be impossible for me to create a scenario that incorporates all the different facets of the situation, but I believe it hits the highlights. I've thought a lot about this situation over the past several weeks and this is my take on it.
The Cliven Bundy family settled in the Bunkerville, Nevada area in the late 1800's. They established a ranching lifestyle and passed it down from one generation to the next. In 1946 the Bureau of Land Management (BLM) was established and began assisting with the management of public lands-already in use by a family that had arrived approximately 70 years earlier. Then, in 1993, this same management organization (the BLM) comes in and informs the Cliven Bundy family that they are no longer allowed to use the land because it is a habitat for the vulnerable (not yet endangered) desert tortoise. Never mind that the cattle and the tortoise have been sharing the land for the past 120 years without causing the extinction of the species? Never mind that this family's livelihood was tied up in the land? Never mind that just down the road in Henderson, Nevada, the same government forcing Cliven off his land for the desert tortoise was also planning to euthanize hundreds of the same species due to lack of funding? He was just to succumb to the will of the government and walk away? Wouldn't you resist, if it was your way of life at stake?
So now an unarmed family is being beaten and attacked. They have sniper rifles trained on them and when they tried to question the BLM about their belief that the BLM had begun shooting and disposing of the cattle on the range land, one of the BLM officers grabbed a 57 year old woman and threw her to the ground. Oh, and heaven forbid you should try to help that woman up or come to her defense, because that gets you hit multiple times with a taser, or at the very least, a threat of German shepherd attack dogs and "you'll be next".
I'm fairly certain that this is bigger than cattle and range land. The government must stand to gain A LOT over this, because if they don't, I can't imagine them fighting this intensely. I think it's safe to say that the government may have forgotten that they work for the people of the United States, and not the other way around. Whether you side with Cliven Bundy or not, the actions of the BLM, on site in Nevada, are inexcusable.
Now, for the disclaimer: Yes. I am a Bundy. I am related to Cliven, somewhere down the line. I believe my great, great grandfather is his great grandfather? Someone with better genealogy skills than mine can verify. I'm not claiming 100% innocence for either side of this situation-- such a thing rarely exists, but the BLM, the federal government, definitely crossed a line on this one. At least that's how the view looks from where I sit. Please, keep any posted comments clean and orderly. You are entitled to your opinions as I am entitled to mine. Discussion is one thing, but blatant disrespect for me or anyone else that may post here is not acceptable.
One day, a team comes to your house and informs you they are now in charge of managing your house. There are a lot of people on the team. They are powerful and influential, and in an attempt to keep the peace, you agree to let them become a part of your life and have occasional access granted to your home. (I mean, you're not unreasonable, and your mother did teach you to share with others.)
Then, one day, this team shows up at your house and tells you that they are changing the scope of their management practices regarding your house, whether you like it or not. You are now going to be confined to living in only a portion of the house and the rest of the house will be given to some cats. Yep, I said cats. Naturally, you resist. Surely the management team can't just decide that you no longer have access to a portion of your house? Regardless of your resistance, the cats move in and you share your space. Still, you're not willing to give up without a fight. You begin seeking the help of legal council, you go to court, you do everything in your power to stop the management team from coming in and destroying your way of life and taking your home.
Finally, a court order is issued. It's not in your favor. The management team is coming in to take your home. Supposedly, their action is to protect the cats living in your house, but the same group that is taking your house for the cats is also down the road killing cats because they just can't afford to support them. What is your reaction to the situation? How do you respond to the management agency when they arrive at your home?
I'll give you a minute to think about it...
Now, I realize this isn't a direct translation of events as they are unfolding in Nevada. It would be impossible for me to create a scenario that incorporates all the different facets of the situation, but I believe it hits the highlights. I've thought a lot about this situation over the past several weeks and this is my take on it.
The Cliven Bundy family settled in the Bunkerville, Nevada area in the late 1800's. They established a ranching lifestyle and passed it down from one generation to the next. In 1946 the Bureau of Land Management (BLM) was established and began assisting with the management of public lands-already in use by a family that had arrived approximately 70 years earlier. Then, in 1993, this same management organization (the BLM) comes in and informs the Cliven Bundy family that they are no longer allowed to use the land because it is a habitat for the vulnerable (not yet endangered) desert tortoise. Never mind that the cattle and the tortoise have been sharing the land for the past 120 years without causing the extinction of the species? Never mind that this family's livelihood was tied up in the land? Never mind that just down the road in Henderson, Nevada, the same government forcing Cliven off his land for the desert tortoise was also planning to euthanize hundreds of the same species due to lack of funding? He was just to succumb to the will of the government and walk away? Wouldn't you resist, if it was your way of life at stake?
So now an unarmed family is being beaten and attacked. They have sniper rifles trained on them and when they tried to question the BLM about their belief that the BLM had begun shooting and disposing of the cattle on the range land, one of the BLM officers grabbed a 57 year old woman and threw her to the ground. Oh, and heaven forbid you should try to help that woman up or come to her defense, because that gets you hit multiple times with a taser, or at the very least, a threat of German shepherd attack dogs and "you'll be next".
I'm fairly certain that this is bigger than cattle and range land. The government must stand to gain A LOT over this, because if they don't, I can't imagine them fighting this intensely. I think it's safe to say that the government may have forgotten that they work for the people of the United States, and not the other way around. Whether you side with Cliven Bundy or not, the actions of the BLM, on site in Nevada, are inexcusable.
Now, for the disclaimer: Yes. I am a Bundy. I am related to Cliven, somewhere down the line. I believe my great, great grandfather is his great grandfather? Someone with better genealogy skills than mine can verify. I'm not claiming 100% innocence for either side of this situation-- such a thing rarely exists, but the BLM, the federal government, definitely crossed a line on this one. At least that's how the view looks from where I sit. Please, keep any posted comments clean and orderly. You are entitled to your opinions as I am entitled to mine. Discussion is one thing, but blatant disrespect for me or anyone else that may post here is not acceptable.
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