Unless I ask, please, as my server, don't tell me how much to tip you!
I get it. Serving at a restaurant can be tough. People ignore you in favor of their cell phones, they are disrespectful, they treat you as though you are less than human and like they are somehow better than you. It baffles me as well. Therefore, I understand the urge to stick it to your patrons, but, at least as far as my money is concerned, it's REALLY not the best way to get good tips!
Tonight my mom and I went out to dinner. When we were seated our server came to take our drink order. I don't drink soda and my mom doesn't drink caffeine after lunch because it keeps her from sleeping. As a result, we both ordered water to drink. (Boring, I know, but read the vibe of your table, man. If, after several times of you asking I haven't flinched on the fact that I want water, please, quit trying to upsell my beverage choice!)
Our meal arrived and we shared a very enjoyable dinner. It tasted great and we had fun chatting while we ate. As we were finishing up, I ordered a dessert to go. I don't often order dessert when I am out, but tonight was a fun night with my mom so it seemed like a good idea. When our server returned with our dessert and our to go boxes (cause let's face it, there was no hope of me ever finishing the amount of food on my plate) he dropped off our check. I put the $25 gift card we had in the check binder as well as my debit card to cover the small remaining balance. Our server left to run the cards. Now, this is where the night gets frustrating for me. When our server returned to the table with the receipt for me to sign he had circled suggested tip amounts on the receipt. I was so insulted! Do I really come across as the type of person who is an incompetent tipper? And even if I do, how do you justify such arrogance in yourself as to tell me how much I should be tipping you??
Now, allow me to share a little of my own personal arrogance--because of the work I do, I tend to be a great tipper. I understand that tips play a huge role in the income of certain jobs and I do my best to take care of my fellow service industry workers. I also understand how a good tip can make a bad day good, and a good day great. I love being able to put a smile on someone's face in such a way. One of my favorite things to do when I have a gift card is to leave the entire amount of the gift card as a cash tip, because I was going to pay for my meal when I decided to go out anyway. It's just a fun thing to do! But I'll tell you, the second I saw those tip amounts circled on my receipt to call my attention to the "appropriate" amount for me to tip, the amount I had been planning to leave was significantly reduced. I really only left what I did because I know that as a server, you are required to tip out to the other people who assist with your tables- the bartender, the busboy, etc.- and those people were fantastic as far as my table went tonight.
So while I understand the temptation to leave a "subtle" reminder for those you serve, especially if you have been stiffed a time or two, I beg of you, don't do it. Keep the beverages full, a smile on your face and be good at what you do. You will be rewarded for it.
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